Short answer: you are generally not required to agree to a buyer’s request for a closing extension or an earnest money release unless your contract says so, but saying no is not automatically the safe choice. The right answer depends on why the buyer is asking, what your contract allows, and what you would do if this deal ended. Read your purchase agreement and talk with your agent (and an attorney if the stakes are high) before you reply.
I see this most often when a lender is behind, an appraisal comes in late, or a buyer’s own sale is delayed. Here is how I walk sellers through it.
Do I have to grant a closing extension?
In many cases, no. The close of escrow date is a contract term, and extending it usually takes a signed written amendment from both sides. Your contract and any deadlines already in play control what happens if a date is missed, so have your agent confirm exactly where you stand before you answer. Whether you agree is a business decision.
What should I ask for in exchange for more time?
If an extension helps you more than it costs you, trade it for something concrete. Common asks include:
- A written, specific new closing date, not an open-ended “a few more days.”
- Additional earnest money, or release of the existing deposit to you as non-refundable once contingencies are removed.
- Per-day compensation for the extension period (often tied to your carrying costs).
- Proof that the delay is real: a lender letter confirming status, clear-to-close timing, or an updated appraisal date.
- Removal of any remaining contingencies tied to the delay.
What are the risks of agreeing, and of refusing?
| Choice | Possible upside | Possible downside |
|---|---|---|
| Agree to extend | Keeps a qualified buyer; avoids relisting time and cost | Delay can repeat; your own move or purchase could be affected; rate or market shifts |
| Refuse | Holds the buyer to the contract; may bring a faster resolution | Deal may end or turn into a dispute; you may be back on the market with a longer days-on-market count |
When does a seller get the buyer’s earnest money?
It depends on the contract and on whether the buyer is in default or used a contingency properly. Release of a deposit typically requires written instructions from both parties or a resolution through the escrow process, and disputes can take time. I explained how deposits are handled in what happens to earnest money if a deal falls apart. Do not assume you will keep the deposit; it is not guaranteed.
How does this connect to my own timeline?
If you are buying your next home, an extension can ripple into your own closing. If your escrow was already tight, review how to prepare for a short escrow. And if multiple offers were in play when you accepted, your backup options may matter when you decide how much patience to extend.
If you are in this spot now, call me. We will look at your contract dates, what the buyer is really asking for, and what I would want in return. Every deal is different, and this is general information, not legal advice.
Geoff Zahler | Broker/Owner, Zahler Properties